Transman has been attempting to get in shape because he plunked down the money to do the Reverse Barbie operation, and it’s a lot easier for the doctor to get things right if the patient looks more like The Rock and less like George Costanza. Being in shape also helps with the recovery and healing. Transman knows all of this. His rational mind speaks up and reminds him of these facts all the time, but lemme tell ya, kids, that Transman fella is lazy. Oh sure, he’ll go swimming every day for a couple of weeks and then one day, it will rain and then Transman acts like it is monsoon season and he needs to stay indoors where it is safe. And where there is a couch. And a TV. And snacks. Tsk. Tsk. Tsk.
Author Archives: transparentguy
Transman has been on testosterone for a couple of years now and his chin is covered with a decent patch of hair, but his mustache is so pitiful and scraggly, he is sad.
He is in good company … many of his imaginary friends offered up consolation and advice:
Transman was tooling around the grocery store trying to navigate the “Oh, God! Tomorrow’s Easter and we didn’t plan a meal or get Easter baskets for the kids!” crowd when he nearly collided with a family with a screaming toddler who was being egged on by the kindergartener in the “scream more and they’ll buy us anything we want!” battle. As he swooped around them and turned toward the bread aisle, coming the opposite direction was an auburn-haired vision, cradling a shopping basket on her arm.
The ginger-haired goddess was a solitary shopper cruising slowly through the store without obligations to anyone or anything. She had only a couple of items her basket: brie, a couple of apples, and a package of spring greens.
She locked eyes with Transman and a smile flickered at the corner of her mouth.
“Where do they keep the wine?” she asked as she got closer.
Transman raised his eyebrows thinking, “I’m not wearing a name tag, lady.” Still, he pointed up at the sign two aisles down and said, “Aisle 12.”
The apparently psychic redhead winked at him and said, “I didn’t ask you for any particular reason … I know you don’t work here.” She beamed at him and turned toward Aisle 12.
Transman nodded and thought, “Well, with hair like this, everyone assumes I’m a beatnik. And everybody knows those bohemian cats know all about wine.” (Clearly, Transman is very slow on the uptake when he is being flirted with. Also, grocery stores really are the place to meet people. People who like wine.)
Nobel Prize winning author Gabriel García Márquez has died. If you haven’t read any of his writing, hunt some down tonight. He was a master storyteller who will lead you down an ordinary street into a world of dreams and return you home safe, but forever changed. You can start your journey here.
Transman was so busy yesterday, he did not post anything for Transgender Day of Visibility, but his pal David Ellis Dickerson created this card for his web series Greeting Card Emergency, and Transman wants to share it even if he is a day late and a dollar short.
To all the transgender folks who are living their lives and sharing their stories with those around them or the wider world, thank you! You never know who is going to be touched by knowing you; as hard as it might be, being yourself is making things better for all those who follow.
And to people like David who stand up for others and spread love and laughter in the world, thank you! You’re also making the world better all the time.