“What else do we have to eat?”

“Transdaddy, we need to go car shopping.” Wilt Chamberlain as Son 1. 

Transman isn’t totally obsessed with being short (because, really, he’s not that short, really. I swear.), but he had a humbling experience when his barely-into-his-teenage-years son got out the measuring tape the other night and said, “Let’s see how tall I am.”

Son 1 is 6’2″. Transman is panicked. There’s still a good 5-6 years of growing ahead for Son 1. He will be 9 feet tall. We need to move out of our house and into a giant Redwood.

Forget hauling that kid anywhere in the overgrown roller skate we refer to as the family car. We’re now in the market for a Liebherr T 282B.

Not only will Son 1 fit in the cab of this, the dump bed is the perfect size for hauling the lad’s daily fill of groceries.  

Let’s not even go into the amount of food the lad can pack away. Transman thought he had a magic refrigerator for a while because as soon as he put food inside, it disappeared. Then, one afternoon as he was unloading the groceries, he realized a giant hand was reaching over and intercepting everything Transman was taking out of the bags and trying to put on the shelf.

“I said, ‘Go make me a sandwich, little man,'” Andre the Giant as Son 1 bossing around his Transdaddy.


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19 responses to ““What else do we have to eat?”

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