In case you didn’t hear me the first time (NSFW)

“Transman! I am appalled! We are not amused. Not in the least! Surely, you could get your message across in less barbaric terms!” The Queen was shocked to see Transman’s latest blog post.

Transman usually keeps his blog PG-13, but not today, kids, not today. Transman’s feeling months’ worth of backed-up snark bubbling around inside and he has to let it out. Far too many people in the past week have told him something along the lines of “I don’t approve!” in regards to his transition. If that’s all they said, he’d let it roll off his back like water off a duck, but since they’re also coupling it with things like, “I think you’re just confused,” and “You’ll change your mind,” and the solid theological argument that “God don’t make no mistakes!”, Transman just can’t let it go in one ear and out the other.

So, since it is National Coming Out Day, Transman has rounded up some of his celebrity stand-ins and their friends and asked for their help in getting his message across to the naysayers who are so uncomfortable with people  who dare be themselves. Almost everyone had the same response:

“Hell, just give ‘em a shit-eating grin and do what you want. It works for me.”

“I’m sending this message from the Great Beyond because I’m the Man in Black.”

“Spread rumors and speculate all you want; here’s all you’re going to get from me.”

“Hey! I got your ‘indecision’ right here!”

” … and then I told Transman, ‘Look, mate, sometimes, you just gotta tell the world to f**k off!’”

Samuel Beckett wiped tears of laughter from his eyes and said, “You’re on earth. There’s no cure for that.”

Then Kurt Vonnegut came along and calmed everybody down with his wisdom: “Laughter and tears are both responses to frustration and exhaustion. I myself prefer to laugh, since there is less cleaning up to do afterward.”

The End

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26 responses to “In case you didn’t hear me the first time (NSFW)

  • Alison

    I am sorry you are having to deal with all that on top of the stress of getting the body and life you should have been born with xx

  • pi314chron

    My heart goes out to you…be strong…this, too, shall pass. Coming out to my wife a few days ago has been traumatic for both of us. I can only hope that her hurt and anger will be replaced with understanding. At this point, everything is very much up in the air…even our marriage. I relate so strongly to what you must be experiencing. May you be strengthened and live a life of joy and peace. Hugs, Randa

    • transparentguy

      You, too, Randa. I’m wishing you both strength right now. It’s a tough journey, but at some point, you have to be you.

      Generally, things have gone pretty well, but I’ve had a weird week or so with these reactions.

  • Fish Out of Water

    If it helps I’m shooting them the finger too.

  • jotsfromasmallapt

    Believe.
    You believe…
    I believe.
    In you…..

  • ginak2012

    I totally get it and join you in your frustration. It’s been a frustrating week or so around here as well. This journey certainly has it’s share of pain, doesn’t it? I just don’t get why it’s anyone’s business. They don’t have to agree…..but they can keep their opinions to themselves.

    • transparentguy

      I know. People in my life makes all kinds of decisions I don’t agree with, but theirs isn’t my life to live, so I feel like I have to let them do their thing. It’s my business to love them as they are. Afford me the same courtesy.

  • Le Clown

    Transman,
    Fuck yeah! Le Clown flips the bird in solidarity! See this? It’s a magnificent finger.
    Le Clown

  • purplemary54

    I love the simple eloquence of a single finger sticking out in defiance. You are indeed The Man.

  • Eris of Discord

    Hey Transman,

    It never ceases to shock me how willing people are to say stupid shit like ‘I don’t approve’ and ‘God don’t make no mistakes’ in regards to pretty much anything– though this example in particular is annoying beyond real words.

    ‘I don’t approve’ – Well who asked you in the first place? I don’t need your approval to find my happiness and I don’t think you need my approval either.

    ‘God don’t make no mistakes’ – Firstly, that’s a double negative. By the laws of arithmetic you speak your blasphemy.

    Secondly, who are you to judge what God wishes for people? If, for example, Transman wants to transition and God controls all and knows all and junk, then it’s pretty obvious that’s the fate God had in mind for him. Assuming God doesn’t make mistakes, we can also assume then that Transman is in the right. Haha! Beaten by your own stupid ass argument! Take THAT, Them!

    ‘I think you’re just confused’ is just kinda funny in the worst and most sad not-funny way. If you have an opinion like that, keep it in your bloody head, you jerk. It’s hard enough without naysayers saying dumb things. No one wants to hear ‘You’ll never succeed’ when they’re climbing a mountain or running a marathon. Transitioning is like climbing a mountain after a marathon with people all around saying idiotic stuff like ‘YOU’R DOING IT WRNOG [sic]‘ and ‘I HATE YOU BECAUSE YOU RUN MARATHONS AND MARATHONS ARE AGAINST GOD’ etc etc. Or in the worst cases, throwing stuff too and generally being terrible to someone they barely know at all, as is common with people who fall in the Them group.

    I don’t think I plan on transitioning (I would not know what to transition to in the first place and if I finished I’d want to transition again the next week), but I’m familiar with how it feels when trying to pass and explaining your motivations for dressing strangely and suddenly growing or losing boobs to people you only sort of know.

    It sucks. Basically.

    I approve of the pictures, by the way. Not that you need my approval.
    Just that I thought you should know they’re awesome. I’ve never seen so many beautiful birds in one place. Anyway. About time for me to get to sleep. Just thought I’d drop in to show solidarity. Take care and all that, Transman.

    <3s,
    Eris

    • transparentguy

      I have a hard time understanding how people feel okay to comment on other people’s personal lives whether it is something like this, a divorce, what afterschool activities you put your child in, etc. Especially because I never do it to other people. If someone is having a hard time making a decision and asks my opinion, I’ll give it, but I don’t just drop it on them even when they do something I find idiotic.

      As far as people telling me God doesn’t make mistakes, I usually think to myself, “No, God didn’t make a mistake. If God exists, I was born this way for a reason–maybe I’m supposed to have insight into both sides of the gender coin for a reason. Maybe I needed to have this particular understanding of the world.” I’ve never claimed my body was a mistake, either. That’s other people interpreting what I say about wanting to make my body and brain be more in alignment.

  • Belle DiMonté

    I always hate it when people stuff their half-baked opinions onto you when you’ve already made the decision of what’s best for you. The pictures say it all!

  • listengirlfriends

    I reposted this on my facebook group for my blog. Brilliant. And I’m so sorry you have to deal with this. You know, I’m a straight young woman, and I get annoyed enough just having to deal with questions about why I’m not married and/or don’t want to have kids, so I can’t even BEGIN to fathom what you have to go through. If I ever get the nerve up to ask people why they DO choose to have kids, I find it amusing they get really defensive. Ahhh…to be normal and to not have to constantly explain yourself (though, normal peeps tend to be super boring in my opinion ;)

    • transparentguy

      Thank you. I don’t get why people feel so compelled to intervene in other people’s lives.

      I have a friend who was single for a long time and had to deal with intrusive questions about her private life; now that she’s married, she’s dealing with questions about whether they’re having kids.

      What bothers me the most is people thinking this is just a whim. It may seem sudden to them because the signs may not have been obvious to them, but I have lived with it my whole life thinking there was little I could do about being transgender. After figuring out that I could do something about it, there was no way I was going to continue pushing aside my own feelings and self worth just to make everyone else happy.

  • medusaprose

    Reblogged this on medusaprose and commented:
    generally my response to people who have a lot to say about my life and the lives of queer people like me. Take your half-wit, ignant opinions and SHOVE them. that is all.

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