Son of Spam: “Please stay us informed like this.”

“Transman’s effin’ brilliant!” Jack Nicholson told the late Dennis Hopper before Transman even started the blog. Jack knew. He just knew. Meanwhile, Dennis thought to himself, “Why doesn’t he f*****g say f***k?!”

Transman loves spam. Especially spam that tells him how wonderful he and his blog are. He will now share with everyone the beautiful messages that spambots the world over send him. Please, gentle reader, enjoy the poetic phrasing of the spambots who compose delightful messages dressed up as awkward sentences with poor punctuation. And you, spambots, you just keep those gems coming.

Spambot No. 1 wrote in with his admiration of Transman’s producing and cast doubts upon the idea that Transman could ever top his March 31 post on etiquette:

“you’ve got questioned this intelect with this great producing! I will be shocked at the a higher level pureness everyone magnify in your producing.”

“Our Hank III-ska-Dixieland tribute is almost ready for the Automation Idol audition!”

Spambot No. 2 was so wrapped up in “personal affection” for Transman’s willingness to share his great wealth of knowledge about the offspring of musical greats, that the poor spambot started tripping over her own cyberdigits trying to type something sensical. Transman thinks the Spambot plans on using the post for some kind of employee training/self-help. He’s not sure what that will entail, but wishes Spambot No. 2 all the best from the bottom of his heart.

“I have to get throughout my personal affection for your goodness assisting folks who require benefit this area of interest. Your current true resolve for moving the perfect solution is close to has been fantastic and still have usually encouraged employees much like me to achieve their set goals. Your personal helpful helpful details implies close to this much somebody just like me and still more to be able to my personal friends. Thanks from all of folks.”

Judging from the short, active sentence construction, Spambot No. 3 had absorbed his Strunk & White before sending a message of love for a post about character; unfortunately, Spambot No. 3′s dictionary software didn’t load completely.

“This site is very educative.”

But, since Transman has a huge ego, Spambot No. 4′s message is his favorite piece of spam ever*:

“this website is the finest world wide web site.”

“Dear Transman, I am loving every producing you generate. Your posts are very educative and I thank you from my most personal affection.”

* Although, he still has deep affection for his Mombot’s messages.

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19 responses to “Son of Spam: “Please stay us informed like this.”

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