“Interesting … most people post pictures of A Flock of Seagulls or Duran Duran for their ’80s Night promos. Thanks for remembering us!” Fun Boy Three as themselves. Image
“C’mon, Transman! They’re playing the Talking Heads! You look just like David Byrne with those glasses!” Janet Jackson as Michelle.
Back in the day, Transman did occasionally indulge in shaking his moneymaker at the local night spots. Well, mostly he just stood around looking troubled and out of place, but he went along with pals like Cristy and Michelle to various watering holes that reeked of clove cigarettes and Boone’s Farm.
“All you have to do is shake your hips … oh, never mind. I forgot about that second left foot of yours. Sorry. Watch my drink, okay?” Linda Evangelista as Cristy.
Michelle and Cristy danced at these places. Transman did not. He leaned against the wall. Except when the DJ played something really special.
Then, he loped out onto the dance floor and sort of bobbed and weaved and tried to make it look like he had a sense of rhythm. No one was fooled.
If Transman could take you back to the mid-80s, here’s what would get him out on the dance floor:
The Talking Heads’ “Life During Wartime.” Transman is proud to report this is Son 2′s favorite song. He shouts “I got some groceries! I got some peanut butter!” as we pull into the supermarket parking lot.
Even Transman got a little mopey joy out of Robert Smith of the Cure and “Friday I’m in Love.”
The happy cheery guitar work of Johnny Marr on the Smiths’ “Girlfriend in a Coma” brought a smile to Transman’s heart, but he never showed it on the outside because, like, that wouldn’t have been cool, y’know?
Joy Division’s “Love Will Tear Us Apart” always made Transman tap his toe unobtrusively.
No night on the dance floor was complete until everyone had run out at least once to dance to the Timelords’ “Doctorin’ the Tardis.”
Now, that you’ve had your dancin’ music lined up, burn this post. Transman can’t let it get out that he dug this stuff.
“You go ahead and dance, girls. I’m just gonna stand here and look moody.” Johnny Depp as Transman, circa 1987.
July 6th, 2012 at 7:54 pm
What about the Thompson Twins and “Til Tuesday?
July 6th, 2012 at 7:56 pm
Oh, Gene, my friend, there are many more Fridays ahead … I have to get “the Safety Dance” into at least one post.
July 6th, 2012 at 7:58 pm
LOL! You know they did the “Ball song” in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.
July 6th, 2012 at 10:12 pm
OK…Now the 80′s I can do. lol Boy the stories i could tell. I really enjoyed that Transman. Thanks for the walk down memory lane.
Oh Split Enz http://youtu.be/xv6oOxn1axw
and The Clash …I am just going to have to write a companion post. you started it. lol
747
July 6th, 2012 at 10:34 pm
This will go on forever now.
July 6th, 2012 at 10:21 pm
Were we best friends in high school? Because I remember that club and I’m pretty sure you were bobbing and weaving next to me for a couple of those songs with your David Byrne glasses.
July 6th, 2012 at 10:35 pm
Sometimes, if I recall correctly, you would Pogo.
July 6th, 2012 at 10:43 pm
It IS you!
July 6th, 2012 at 10:45 pm
Thanks for taking three steps backward that time I tried to stage dive at The Replacements’ show.
July 7th, 2012 at 12:30 pm
Sorry. Between the Aquanet, clove smoke and Drakkar fumes, I had a hallucinogenic out of body experience. and thought you were Jesus come to take me back to church. Honest mistake.
July 6th, 2012 at 11:28 pm
I KNEW you were enjoying yourself all those nights! It’s scary to imagine that your kids will very possibly be cooler than you. That’s just dangerous. To wield that kind of power. Oh, and thanks for having Linda stand in for me. I appreciate you respecting the fact that unlike Linda, I don’t get out of bed for less than 20 grand (apparently she’ll show up for anything over $10k) and really don’t have the time to pose for shots that I don’t take of myself while being driven around by my chauffeur/husband.
P.S. It’s Friday…and I AM in love.
July 7th, 2012 at 11:41 am
My kids are definitely dangerous. Linda was a little grouchy when I called, but she’s been hurting for work lately and jumped at the chance to be in this blog.
I put The Cure there just for you. I should’ve put in “the Love Cats,” though, because that’s one I remember listening to the most around you.
July 7th, 2012 at 7:13 pm
You have an excellent memory. Love Cats is my all time favorite Cure song, but I love the one you posted as well.
So did Linda put out? I mean, you’re eventually going to be a lot more famous than she is. Actually, you may be more famous at this point. Does anyone under the age of 30 even know who Linda Evangelista is?
July 8th, 2012 at 5:09 pm
Surely she’s been on some kind of reality show. If not, when Charlyne Yi and I take over the entertainment industry, we’ll make sure Linda has some work. Maybe she can play a former high-powered CEO who is demoted to being a barrista in the company’s café.
July 8th, 2012 at 11:31 pm
I think you’re assuming she can speak. I’m pretty sure that all her Loreal commercials used voiceovers.
July 9th, 2012 at 6:53 pm
Puppet Linda is better than real Linda.
July 6th, 2012 at 11:58 pm
“Let’s dance, put on your red shoes and dance the blues.”
July 7th, 2012 at 11:37 am
I strongly liked that song (‘cuz I don’t love nothing.)
July 7th, 2012 at 2:17 am
Another Lovely post which made me smile (and remember) the UK in the 80′s.
July 7th, 2012 at 11:37 am
The 80s music from the UK was the best.
July 7th, 2012 at 2:47 pm
I cannot argue there.
July 7th, 2012 at 11:17 am
Loved reading this! The power of music man…it transforms, and it sure does transport.
July 7th, 2012 at 11:38 am
Put on your mock turtleneck and dance the night away.
July 7th, 2012 at 12:48 pm
“Stop Making Sense” is one of the live albums of all time.
July 8th, 2012 at 5:12 pm
Yes, it is. They were really tight live.
October 23rd, 2012 at 9:19 pm
And we went to the “Artsy” theater to see the movie. I know we danced our way out of there. Oh wait, I was dancing, you were doing the Marx brothers thing…
July 7th, 2012 at 1:03 pm
Transman,
What great timing! This very week, The Ringmistress dropped unpacking one day, to meet me in the living room, and asked:
What have we been listening to for the past few days? Is it the same band?
I answered: Yes, it’s some very old Simple Minds. Real to Real Cacophony. Great, right?
The Ringmistress: Can we listen to something else?
Thank you for your post, kindred spirit.
Le Clown
July 8th, 2012 at 5:11 pm
I just found a copy of Kate Bush’s “The Hounds of Love” and gave it a new home, so I’m right there with you.
October 23rd, 2012 at 9:29 pm
Oh how I long to to swivel my hips like it was 1985! Now I get a touch of the lumbago if I try to dance along to the Violent Femmes or Bronski Beat. Hell, one wrong move to a Carpenters’ song and I could break a hip.
Looking at my current gravatar, I think the Janet Jackson is not a far stretch. You preach the truth transman.
(I still chant the chorus to Kiss Off:
I hope you know this will go down
On your permanent record
Oh yeah well don’t get so distressed
Did I happen to mention that I’m impressed
I take one one one cause you left me and
Two two two for my family and
3 3 3 for my heartache and
4 4 4 for my headaches and
5 5 5 for my lonely and
6 6 6 for my sorrow and
7 7 for no tomorrow and
8 8 I forget what 8 was for and
9 9 9 for a lost god and
10 10 10 10 for everything everything everything everything
You can all just kiss off into the air
Behind my back I can see them stare
They’ll hurt me bad but I won’t mind
They’ll hurt me bad they do it all the time) ha ha – made you sing!