Transman really has nothing to say, but he wanted a chance to make his lady-lovin’ readers happy on this day when Americans celebrate their independence with alcohol, explosives, and overeating. Be careful out there kids.
Wait, no, there is something … Transman and Son 2 competed in a watermelon-eating contest. Alas, they lost to a father-teenage son duo who cheated by not eating anything until the contest and making sure to talk loudly about the free ice cream so that Son 2 would go fill up on vanilla ice cream and sugar wafer cones beforehand. Those bastards!
And to round out your Fourth of July, here’s a super creepy video of the Beach Boys’ “Surfin’ USA.” Check out Mike Love shakin’ his groove thang with a beach bunny. Kind of makes you wish you had a time machine, don’t it?