When Transman came out and told friends and family that he was going to be going through the long process of changing his body to match his brain, most reacted with a shrug and went back to swilling their beers or coffees or whatever. For most, Transman’s coming out didn’t seem to be much of a surprise. In fact, one of his friends was shocked to find out he had been born with female bits.
Here are Transman’s favorite reactions to his coming out:
5. Transman was very nervous about telling his kids what was up. He had visions of tears and screaming, of rejection, of his children telling him they didn’t love him or were embarrassed by him. But that didn’t happen. His oldest son said, “Why would you be afraid to tell me this? You raised me; I love you.” Now, before you get all verklempt, Transman should tell you that the boy hugged his daddy-mommy and then sat back and looked him over again. Then he said, “Why would I care what you do? You’re weird anyway.”
4. One of his oldest–as in he’s known her for a long time; she’s eternally 29–friends apologized profusely for making him wear a dress to be in her wedding. “Oh, dude, I am so sorry. I feel awful. Gosh, I wish I would have known; you could’ve worn a tux or something.” Then she immediately asked if he could change the oil in her car.
3. Transman’s neighbor came over to tell him, “Expect to hear me tell a lot more dick jokes now.” Then the neighbor eyed Transman’s George Kastanza-esque physique and said, “You wanna start working out with us? Pump up. Get some guns.”
2. One of Transman’s friends from his high school years said he was very relieved to hear this news because, “I was always wondering why–as a totally gay boy–I had such a crush on you. You made me question my sexuality for years.”
1. Two of Transman’s female friends immediately went into matchmaker mode. “I have the perfect girl for you,” each one shrieked as he finished his Coming Out speech. Transman had been single for a while. No one had wanted to introduce him to their friends until he had decided to let his freak flag fly. Suddenly, Transman was a commodity. He wondered how his friends would pitch him to these single gals in their lives: “I’ve got the perfect man for you! He’s good with kids. He’s funny. He’s smart. He has a job. He has a Ph.D. He has boobs.”